Giant Python Bites Man on His "Python" While He Sits on the Toilet

Does it count as cheating if an unsolicited animal starts yanking on your genitals? A ten foot long python climbed out of Attaporn Boonmakchuay’s toilet and went to town on his junk.

Attaporn, 38, of Thailand was causally using his home toilet when the python attacked. As the python tried to pull him down into the sewer, his wife and neighbours came to help and eventually restrained the python by prying his jaw apart.

He told the Bangkok Post, “I felt as though my penis had been severed. The snake was yanking very hard.” Attaporn lost a lot of blood in the incident, but doctors say he is recovering well.

A 10-foot python slithered up a toilet and bit a man. How he survived https://t.co/0tXYpaBFUPhttps://t.co/Vbl3vZCcHh

— NBC New York (@NBCNewYork) May 26, 2016

His wife came to his rescue, tying a rope around the snake’s neck while Attaporn pried the snake’s jaw open before passing out because he lost so much blood. As for the snake, it’s been released back into the wild. No one will ever sit comfortably on a toilet again.